What am I doing here?
This morning I got out of bed, took a long shower, gathered my materials needed for the day from around the house, kissed my wife good-bye and scurried to the offices at PTS to accomplish everything needed before my registration appointment this afternoon. And in this time one thought haunts my mind: what am I doing here, at Princeton, in NJ? My wife is pregnant, money is very short, there is no family member within a 800 miles, most things are unfamiliar...
What if...scares me. There are many people I can talk to here, but it has not been natural for me to socialize, to ask someone else for help. Slowly, my wife is teaching me that asking for help is no bad thing, but it still seems contrary to some innate feeling...
When I graduate, the possibility of finding a mediocre to high-paying job is slim. And though that would not matter to me, I feel that the responsibility of caring for my wife and child falls upon myself. My wife is very independent and will no doubt receive a prestigious degree after having our child, or perhaps find a good-paying job herself, but as of now we both feel hopelessly in debt, and hopelessly tired from the strenuous move. Perhaps I should quit my incessant worrying and do...
As I was arranging my class schedule for the semester I came across a specialized program that PTS offers come middle year of a seminarian. There is a program that I can apply to at Rutgers that will add a year onto study, but will present the opportunity for an MSW -- masters in social work. Psychology has always been an interest in mine as I began my collegiate studies in the field and so the opportunity to participate in a social work program at Rutger's is very attractive. My original intent was to work through the MDiv degree and perhaps move to the ThM program in which I can gain a masters in theology so that I might have the opportunity to teach at the higher education level, or perhaps be better informed when I start parish ministry in the Presbyterian Church. But now I feel that the SMW might be an opportune route that really adds to my growth and ultimately to my ministry. Being undecidedj/unsure as to what form my ministry I should pursue, my hope is that all three of the programs might be a grand opportunity to grow.
The atmosphere here is wonderful for just an opportunity as this. The cultural diversity is great, the fusion of theory and praxis is comforting, the community and its resources are rich and diverse, the libraries are a once in a lifetime opportunity...
Still, I am worried...perhaps I will visit the Trinity Counseling Services for a few appointments...it can't hurt...and it's free...
Today, Amy and I have an appointment for blood work on her and perhaps a sonogram and a toxicology test...keep us in your thoughts...and I'll keep you informed as to our status.
What if...scares me. There are many people I can talk to here, but it has not been natural for me to socialize, to ask someone else for help. Slowly, my wife is teaching me that asking for help is no bad thing, but it still seems contrary to some innate feeling...
When I graduate, the possibility of finding a mediocre to high-paying job is slim. And though that would not matter to me, I feel that the responsibility of caring for my wife and child falls upon myself. My wife is very independent and will no doubt receive a prestigious degree after having our child, or perhaps find a good-paying job herself, but as of now we both feel hopelessly in debt, and hopelessly tired from the strenuous move. Perhaps I should quit my incessant worrying and do...
As I was arranging my class schedule for the semester I came across a specialized program that PTS offers come middle year of a seminarian. There is a program that I can apply to at Rutgers that will add a year onto study, but will present the opportunity for an MSW -- masters in social work. Psychology has always been an interest in mine as I began my collegiate studies in the field and so the opportunity to participate in a social work program at Rutger's is very attractive. My original intent was to work through the MDiv degree and perhaps move to the ThM program in which I can gain a masters in theology so that I might have the opportunity to teach at the higher education level, or perhaps be better informed when I start parish ministry in the Presbyterian Church. But now I feel that the SMW might be an opportune route that really adds to my growth and ultimately to my ministry. Being undecidedj/unsure as to what form my ministry I should pursue, my hope is that all three of the programs might be a grand opportunity to grow.
The atmosphere here is wonderful for just an opportunity as this. The cultural diversity is great, the fusion of theory and praxis is comforting, the community and its resources are rich and diverse, the libraries are a once in a lifetime opportunity...
Still, I am worried...perhaps I will visit the Trinity Counseling Services for a few appointments...it can't hurt...and it's free...
Today, Amy and I have an appointment for blood work on her and perhaps a sonogram and a toxicology test...keep us in your thoughts...and I'll keep you informed as to our status.
posted by Timcom at 10:53 AM
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